Friendship, Love and Limits.

This blog is cut into two parts because I started writing Part 1 and then lost it all (WordPress!!!!) I then started writing again but I’d forgotten everything I wrote so I condensed it and then wrote Part 2 instead… Just thought I’d throw that out there..

Part 1

We all have limits. It would be interesting to know if taking care of an Adult Baby was one of Mummy’s limits before we met. Giving how she reacted when I first told her, I’d say it never even entered her head… But on a whole, the “AB/DL” scene doesn’t seem to have ever bothered her. But I did come to learn about some specific limits/ground rules after our first few playdates (We often try to discuss things we like/dislike to better the experience for both of us).

Certain objects like bottles and dummies/pacifiers can freak people out, and for other people it may be something like speaking in baby talk that tests their limits. On the other hand, for some Little’s, the experience might not be fulfilling without a bottle a pacifier so its important to find a good balance.. Give and take is definitely healthy in a relationship and it’s important not to be selfish because it proves both person’s wants/needs are equally important.

A personal example: One of my girlfriend’s limits is if I were to wet. She certainly doesn’t like changing a wet nappy (diaper), so I don’t do it when we’re together. Yeah that sucks for me, and it would suck for most Littles I think. But this isn’t just about me, its about what works for us in our relationship. Maybe one day it’ll change, but for now I’m thankful for what we currently have. There are definitely things I’d enjoy which I’ve yet to mention to my Mummy because I think would test her limits. But it’s been crucial for us to take things slowly. Perhaps one day we’ll talk more about them..but if not, I’m sure wouldn’t kill me.

Part 2

I was talking to a friend the other day over drinks and the conversation got onto the topic of Sex. It was a pretty general conversation at first, but we moved onto the subject of “limits” and things we would/wouldn’t do with a partner.

She said her sexual limits were “Sh*t, P*ss and/or anything to do with Adult Babies”. I laughed because I love how blunt that sentence was. Given my recent history and experiences, I tried to challenge my friend by asking…

“Would you not indulge in any of those things for somebody even if you were in love with them?”

No. Never. It’s freaky sh*t, and the smell of faeces makes me want to vomitshe replied.

“Well, me too if I’m honest” I said “…but I don’t think that would stop me trying it if the person I loved was into it. I bet you would at least give it a go”

“No way! What about if they liked wearing nappies and acting like a baby?!”

(This conversation getting in to dangerous territory, I thought)

“Wouldn’t you do that if you were in love?” 

“No. I’d sooner break up with them than treat a fully grown man like a baby”

“I’m sure if you loved them you’d think differently” I said.

She asked me about mine but I wasn’t sure, I said I’d try anything once within reason but that it was probably something along the lines of cock & ball torture.. I went on to say that I would definitely try to push my limits if I knew it would satisfy my girlfriend (Between me and you, I’m very happy she’s not into cock & ball torture though)

We laughed it off and moved on.

Sure, the conversation was pretty light hearted and most of the comments I’m sure were throw away.. This sort of chat doesn’t represent a persons entire belief system. I know deep down my friend is an open minded and a generally accepting person (we were talking about sex after all and not about our every day attitude towards others)… But that got me thinking about how each of my friends would react if they knew about this side of me. I know that many people say “A true friends will accept and stick by you no matter what” which may be true to some extent.. but I have some friends who I believe just don’t have that side to their personality and wouldn’t want to know something like this about their friend. Yes I have friends who I’m sure I would stick by no matter what, it doesn’t mean they would do the same for me as we have different beliefs and things we can/can’t handle. I don’t think that has to mean the friendship isn’t equal..

“It appears to become problematic when situations place an emphasis for disclosure…i.e. getting engaged or getting married. The infantilized individual grapples for a decision because fears of ashamedness, rejection, abandonment and exploitation are commonly associated with past developmental struggles in childhood. It brings to surface a terrifying risk that the new partner or family member will misunderstand and take the position it is a bizarre perverted derangement and action to crush the behavior is paramount.” – Kathi Stringer

This has always been accurate concerning me and I can’t ever see myself confiding in anybody else other than my girlfriend about this. Firstly, because I don’t really see the benefit in it, but secondly because I don’t think any of my friends are ready to hear this, nor would they want to. I think that would be the limit to their friendship… Or perhaps being this open with a friend is my limit…

What are some of your limits?

FYI: My cheesy soundtrack to this post is:

Meat Loaf I would do anything for Love,

FeistLimit to your Love,

The Jackson Five – I’ll be there.


14 thoughts on “Friendship, Love and Limits.

  1. To part 1, I can tell you that abdl never entered my brain. It wasn’t ever a consideration or thought. Sure, I knew people were into all kinds of stuff, but it just wasn’t ever part of my world so I didn’t think about what that might entail.

    Can I ask why your girlfriend’s limit is you wetting? That is the most satisfying part of wearing for me. I don’t think I could even stand wearing and not wetting. It would be like ordering food and then letting it sit there uneaten.

    Beyond my wetting experience, I know my husband loves it, too. I would never want to take away from his satisfaction and enjoyment. Plus, I love changing him. It’s such an intimate experience taking his diaper off, wiping him down, putting a new diaper on, and getting him back into his undies. And he’s not even a little, so I imagine that would be even more important and special if he was.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah I definitely see what you mean about it being a very satisfying part of wearing! and I often do, but at the moment I just keep that part to myself. My partner already does enough for me hah! I wouldn’t really want to put her in a position she’s not totally comfortable with. She’s not really taking away any satisfaction from me because there are other aspects of being a Little which are just as exciting for me and for me. Wetting isn’t really the focal point of it all (I guess that’s the difference between being an AB and a DL). I’m sure at some point her limits/interests may change (for the better or worse!) but for now we’re taking things one step at a time.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I guess that’s a good point. I suppose that I fall much more into the DL side of things. Even my little side I wouldn’t classify as AB because the age I identify with would not be wearing diapers and isn’t a baby. It’s not even about specific actions as much as feeling safe and loved and cherished. So I can see how having those other things fulfilled would be just as exciting and satisfying in a different way. And I’m glad you haven’t had to give up wetting completely.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Aw thank you for the concern! 😀 Luckily I do.. I do feel sad for others who aren’t as lucky as me and thats *partly* why I write this blog, just to show that a AB/DL relationship can’t be perfect for everybody! It took hard work for us to get where we are. Sure for some its easier and for some its harder.. but either way its still always nice to read about other peoples experiences.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. About Part 2, I think you’re right that your friend was probably just making an off-hand comment. It’s certainly very possible that those are her hard limits, though. I know maybe my first comment/question was a little harsh on your girlfriend for being anti-wetting, but I do respect that some people can’t handle things that I find perfectly reasonable and even hot.

    I have hard limits that other people are all about. No matter how much I love my husband, if he was into polyamory or threesomes or anything else that would bring other people into our sex life, that would be it. I wouldn’t try it because that would tear me apart and kill a piece of who I am. Sadly, it would mean we just weren’t compatible. I would much rather sacrifice a partner who I’m not compatible with than have either of us unfulfilled sexually or emotionally uncomfortable.

    As for telling other people, I’m of the opinion that it’s none of their business. I like to connect with other people online like this who share my experience because it can be nice to talk about this side of me. For the most part, though, I feel like my husband is the only person in my life who needs to know about our sex life. I rather enjoy having secrets that only we know that would likely shock the people in our lives. I only blog with his permission and as a way to bring us even closer by recounting things that make us both hot.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah its definitely been nice having secrets as a couple! We often chuckle when we’re out with friends and the subject of AB/DL comes up (Im surprised how many times people bring it up unprovoked. Perhaps they’re not telling me something? haha). My friends often make jokes about it and thats fine…but the funniest thing about it is that they don’t know this side of me ha. But you’re right, its none of their business either way. Friends have been over at my house and they’ve asked “Why do you have bath toys next to the bath?” and my response is generally a straight forward “Can you think of a better place for them?” 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      • It does seem rather odd that AB/DL comes up a fair bit in your friend group. I have never, ever had that come up in any conversation other than with my husband.

        We’ve got a large trunk in our house that locks with the majority of our stuff in it. We do now have two cases of diapers in the boxes they came in sitting next to it right now, but we don’t have people come over that much.


      • Ha I think generally my friends like talking about stuff they find odd or unusual. It makes for more interesting conversation I guess. But I’ve definitely noticed a rise in AB/DL conversations recently hah!


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